John Gray
“For which of you, intending to build a tower, sitteth not down first, and counteth the cost, whether he have [sufficient] to finish [it]?” Luke 14:28 KJV
It’s Friday night. You just got paid. You know the rest of the song. If you don’t, then you’re probably white. Black people used to sing that song every payday where I’m from. Everybody was happy and smiling. It was like Christmas and the Fourth of July all rolled into one. But I never heard anyone singing, “It’s Monday morning. Money’s gone. Got a hangover. Weekend was too long.” Never heard that one. Monday was responsibility day. You had to earn that money to pay those bills. Somebody shout amen.
By the time most of you read this, it will be either late Friday night or it’s already Monday again, so you can feel exactly where I’m coming from. You were soooo excited when that clock was winding up on Friday. You couldn’t wait to get to your car. But the moment you get there, you’re already headed back towards Monday. It never ends, unless you’re a kid. Man, did we have it good. Well, some of us had it good. My dad left but my momma stayed. I love you ma. You are the hardest working, most diligent and faithful person I know. You’re loyal and giving and a woman of prayer and action. Which brings me to a point: are you sure I wasn’t adopted? I’m thirty-three and I am pretty sure that I didn’t inherit those qualities from you! I’m only half joking!
You’re reading a letter from a guy who, as a kid, would run my bathwater at my mom’s request of course, then sit by the tub with the door closed and sit next to the tub, on the floor, and splash the water with my hand and sit there for ten minutes so she would think that I took a bath. I did all of that because I didn’t want to get in that water. I worked hard to be lazy. I went to bed stinking many a night! Man that’s funny! It felt good to ‘get away’ with not taking that bath. But I never counted the cost. You see, at school the next day, when I wanted to converse with a particular young lady, I didn’t have the confidence to get close because I was sure she would be able to smell my disobedience. It’s all connected. And it’s still funny.
It’s funny but dangerous. You see, when you’re little and you shirk responsibility, you tend to think that you can get away with things. You begin to think that the rules don’t apply to you. You could almost begin to think that it’s your world and everyone has to do what you say. It’s just not the case. The reason this Manna is being sent so late is that I was dealing with the fruit of immaturity in an area of personal development that came knocking on my door this very day.
Now see? Just look at you. See how you are? You’re not even focused on the word right now. You’re over there on the other side of the screen trying to figure out what I did or what happened. Nosy! No I didn’t go to jail! No I wasn’t arrested. And no, the baby isn’t mine. It’s my cousins. I’m just playing. But for real though, I had to deal with a situation that cost me a lot of money but it didn’t have to had I done what I needed to do in a timely fashion. I was so busy running around the earth trying to save everyone else that my own personal life was suffering. You can be deep if you want to, but past reading the Bible and fasting and praying, you need to pay your bills on time. Now I feel the Holy Ghost for real. I was like this big kid running around living life carefree. But when you’re finished having fun running around and traveling, you have to open up mail and run a household. That’s the part I didn’t like. I only like certain types of mail, and I can tell which letters I’m going to open based on the envelope. Have you ever done that? Yes you have. Quit lying.
When I got mail, if it wasn’t a Christmas card or a letter with cursive writing on the front letting me know that it wasn’t from a bill collector, I wouldn’t open it. That’s immaturity. I’m all on television and I have songs on the radio and all that. But at the end of the day if I can’t pay bills on time, my witness is tainted. Handle life before life handles you. This is practical stuff today. If you have a calling on your life, that’s great. Just make sure you count the cost before you trot off into the world trying to do everything. I know you love Jesus. I know you’re saved. And I know that Jesus paid it all. But He’s not paying your bills for you. You have to do that. Write the check. Put it in the mail. With a stamp. Open the envelope back up. Sign the check. Get some tape. Close the envelope. Take it to the mailbox. Leave it there. Let the mail carrier come and get it. Open your door. Let your German Shepherd run out and bite their pants leg off. Okay, don’t do that. But you know what I’m saying. Take care of the daily responsibilities of life. You’ll be surprised at how much God will bless the rest of your stuff when you take care of home first.
Many pastors, and leaders in general for that matter, have had unnecessary drama in their respective places of influence because they went after the bright lights of a position without counting up the costs attached to that platform as far as personal health, family and finances were concerned. I learned today that you can’t neglect one for the sake of the other. They’re all connected. What good is your witness to a credit card company or car company if your check bounces? You have the Fish on your check and a Cross. But your check is a miracle. It was made of flat paper, yet it bounced like a rubber ball. Hallelujah. You will never know the small things that can have a major impact on your life or the lives of others.
The Christian life should be a life of balance. We should encourage connection to a local body of believers. We should do outreach. We should feed the hungry and clothe those in need. But we should also have a structured and organized home life that does not lend itself to the chaotic. Let’s stop living day-to-day. Let’s think about the future. Let’s count the cost of our actions or inactions from today and see what that could possibly reap for us in harvest in the weeks, months or years to come. And don’t be like me earlier today. I wanted to blame everyone else for my misery. I wanted to blame everyone else except the one whose fault it really was: my own.
I had to grow up today. Growth hurts. But it’s necessary. If I want a worldwide platform, I better count the cost and know that my private life isn’t so private anymore. I better count the cost and realize that what I do affects others. I better count the cost and know that what I say will most likely be repeated whether I want it to be or not. I better count the cost and know that just because I am anointed, it doesn’t exempt me from honoring the statutes of the land. I can’t live like that little spoiled kid anymore. I have to get in that tub and scrub the dirt off. It’s time to grow up.
Well, enjoy your weekend. OR have a happy Monday. You’ll be getting another Manna in a few minutes(for those reading this at the beginning of the week!). And remember, what you do today affects your future in ways you may not be able to imagine. A good name is to be desired above riches. Count the cost attached to your calling, your job, your platform or your ministry. Assess the weak areas and fight to shore them up. That’s where true elevation begins.
God blesses where His reputation is safe.
Can He count on you not to make His Name look bad?
Keep counting.
John Gray
www .myspace.com/johngraymusic
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